Breaking Through

At first I was excited to work on Meisner. But as we went through the exercises I found that it was harder than any other technique I've studied. I went in expecting immediate results and, much to my dismay, it didn't work out that way. I've always had a problem acting on impulse. Living in the streets, I couldn't afford to do that. Every move I made had to be carefully thought out and planned. I can see the result of that in my work. For a long time I wasn't getting anywhere, it felt like I was at a stand-still in the work and I was so ready to give up. 

I think incorporating the justification for the activity really helped me. I was finally able to connect the repetition with the extreme point of views and that's when I began to grow. Just doing an activity with no reason wasn't good enough for me. I didn't get the point. But he daydreaming exercise helped me. I got to explore a situation that I never would have the balls to do otherwise. I put it off until the last possible day. I dreaded that assignment because I knew that I'd have to finally confront my fears. That daydreaming exercise began to knock down a wall that has been up for years, and I was finally able to break through and grow in the work. 

-Darius